Weekly Picks

It’s the Friday we’ve been waiting for all summer…Friday night lights begins this Friday (Thursday for a few teams) and it can’t come soon enough. I’m tired of the Browns’ Super Bowl talk, the media picking state champions before the season starts and I need something else to do on Friday nights because my golf game is bad. It’s time for Whippet football and I can’t wait.

Since a lot of you loved last year’s weekly picks to prove how dumb I really am, I figured I might as well start off this season with a bang.

I’ll be picking all games involving MOAC schools, and yes, RV still gets a 10-point home field advantage.

But not this week, as RV is traveling to Elgin, Thursday evening.

I had to look up where Elgin is. I found it and it’s between a cluster of cornfields and a cluster of cornfields somewhere in Marion Country. Elgin is a D6 school about the size of Wynford, or approximately 100 less students than RV, so you do the math. I guess RV needs an opening win badly. RV lost their three-year starting QB, Chase Ebert and are on the road, but as much as it pains me, I’m staking the Vikings to win by 14.

Now we’ll head to Pleasant who hosts North Union. North Union is another school I had to look up. North Union is in Richwood, which is about 20 miles south of Marion and does have a Subway, Kirby’s Towing, Smokey Bear’s Grill and Chill and of course, a Dollar General. Pleasant lost 20+ seniors off a 5-6 team from last year. Their coach left to go to Harding and their bussing to sporting events is about as reliable as an 89’ Yugo (Google it). I’m taking Union, wonderful if the Pleasant busses can be late for a home game?

Now let’s find out if we need another geography lesson to find Harding’s opponent…we don’t, they travel to Mt. Vernon, the city with a dog fountain in the town square…really, they do. Everyone should take the drive to Mt Vernon to see Sparky shooting water out of his mouth. Harding brings in Pleasant’s coach and Mt. Vernon is bad. I’m taking the Prexies by 14. I still haven’t figured out what a Prexie is.

Highland travels to Fredericktown to take on the Freddies, what the heck is a Freddie and where is Fredericktown? Heck, I’m still trying to figure out what a Fighting Scot is. In a battle of what the heck nicknames, I’m taking the Fighting Scots over the Freddies by 10.

Now we get into some good games…the Rough Riders of St. Mary’s Memorial travel to Galion to take on the Tigers. I didn’t even bother to look up where St Mary’s is, but I know their football team is good, but so is Galion. The Tigers bring back a bevy of returning players and I think they’ll be fighting for a top spot in the MOAC. This should be a good game at Heise Park, but I’ll take the Rough Riders by 7.

Division Four state runner up, Perkins travels to the Valley to take on Clear Fork. The Colts should be another team battling for a MOAC title and Perkins losses some key players from last year’s team. Here’s hoping the Perkins busses don’t get lost and end up in Bellevue. I’m taking Perkins by 14.

To me, the game of the week is Ontario traveling to Lexington. Lex will be out to prove their D1 recruits are legit and Ontario is replacing Bodgpen Miller. The cupboards aren’t bare in Warrior land and they’ll be in the MOAC race. If new Ontario QB, Trey Remy, is legit, look out, the Warriors could be really good. On paper, this looks to be a blowout with a senior-laden Lex team battling the young Warriors, but I don’t think so. I think Lex wins, but I think it’ll be a close game, I’m going with the Minutemen to win by 8.

And now for our Whippets traveling to the longest ticket line in the world. The dead cellphone capital and the land where the sun always beats down on the visiting fans. Let’s be real folks, you must get to the game an hour early in hopes of getting by the lone ticket taker before kickoff. At least we don’t have to listen to an annoying PA announcer, because you can’t hear a damn thing on the visitor’s side. The Whippets are loaded with talent and while I think the Rams may be an improving team, I don't see them beating Shelby. I think the Whippets start off the season with a clock game, but only the fans in attendance will get to see it because Madison is the only school that hasn’t figured out the internet and streaming services. On a positive note, the best in the business, Aaron Hines and Eric Will will be on the call for a WMAN radio broadcast.

And a disclaimer, these picks are for entertainment purposes only

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